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Stuck at 23


Lately I’ve been thinking that I’m alone

That nothing will ever change or get better

My hair is long and tangled around inside

Like my insides feel and outsides look

I’m surely stuck at that boy when 23

There are showdowns and fights in my head tonight

I’m looking the past into it’s face squarely

You must be true or get to movin’

I’ve had about as much as I can take

But then I recall it’s all about that doll at 23

So now that you know where my heart stands

I ask so kindly of you- how is your heart?

Where can I find you?❤



Dear God/dess:❤🙏

You promised and I believe you. I trust in Your plan but can you throw a girl a rainbow 🌈 ?! It’s time.

Thanks, God.



Toolbox for Reducing Stress

  • Meditation

  • Yoga

  • Avoiding negative triggers

    • news

    • negativity

    • energy

    • people

  • Increase positive influences

    • people

    • music

    • vibes

  • Increase physical activity

    • walking

    • gently stretching

    • tai chi

  • Deep breathing

  • House environment

    • clean

    • smudging

    • crystals

    • declutter

    • open windows and blinds

    • add light

    • new plants

  • Hold crystals

  • Beanbag meditation

  • Joyous Activities

    • writing/journaling

    • oracle cards

    • reading

    • hiking

    • gardening

    • playing with cats

    • being connected w daughter

  • Visualization/Guided Imagry

  • Vision Boarding

  • Crafts

  • Prayer

  • Nap

  • Read

  • Hang with friends

  • Enjoy nature

  • Watch a candle burn


The Reasons Why

To be a healthy role model to my daughter
To save money
To smell good all the time
To breathe better/For my health
For freedom from bondage of the addiction to nicotine
To free my time that is spent smoking
To develop healthy coping skills and utilize them day by day
To take life “one day/moment at a time”
To be accountable for my actions
For me, myself & I (and my Higher Power always within me)
To hear my intuition and guidance more clearly
To feel the accomplishment of being a nonsmoker
For my family and true friends
To live a better lifestyle
To believe in me
To set a goal and see it through
To learn how to ask for help when needed
To learn how to deal with the triggers in my life
To learn how to go through post-accute withdrawal successfully
To use my toolbox of spiritual tools and add to it during this process
To share my experience with others (my experience, strength, and hope) along the way
To journal my process that it might possibly serve others who are trying to quit or want to quit, too
To believe in the power of prayer, good intentions and positivity coupled with action steps toward progress
To work an honest program that thoroughly and completely transforms my soul, spirit, body and mind
To envision a new me and then see it to fruition
For a better, more clean environment and atmosphere
For a chance to make a difference and a change
For the possibility of transformation both individually and collectively

Good Friday Prayers

Sweat Lodge Prayer

Great Creator,

We come before you in a humble manner and ask for your help. We offer these herbs and pray. To the four sacred directions and powers of the Universe we pray: to the spirits of the air in the north, to the spirits of the fire in the east, to the spirits of the earth in the south, to the spirits of the the water in the west.

We pray and give thanks to you, O Great Spirit.

We pray and give thanks to Grandfather Sun, the Grandmother Moon, to the Mother Earth, and our relations in Nature. We thank you for your power, energy, gifts, and resources, because without you we would not be able to live and survive. We ask that you forgive us if we have ever harmed or hurt you. We pray, offer this tobacco and herbs, and ask that you doctor us, heal us, purify us, and protect us. We pray for our Elders, women, children, and fellow human beings.

We ask for peace, harmony, and healing wordwide.

Thank you, Great Spirit.


Dream Prayer

O Great Creator and the good doctor spirits. I offer you this tobacco and sacred cedar. I ask for your help. I want to learn how to develop and use my dreams, to remember my dreams, and to learn from my dreams. I ask that the spirit of this cedar and good powers protect me while I experiment with this dreaming power. I ask that my soul be my teacher and protector. I ask that I be given a dream ally who will serve as my teacher, adviser and guardian. I ask that you protect me from all bad thoughts, powers and entities. Teach me how to creatively develop my dreams, to use dreams to answer certain questions, to resolve problems in my life, or to decipher dreams that I don’t understand. Thank you for all of your help and assistance. I feel so much gratitude in my heart for these insights and abilities.

Morning Sun Salutation

To tap into the power of the Sun, you must get up just before sunrise, go out and make prayers, sing and dance, and give thanks to Grandfather Sun. Give thanks for meeting the new day with a new life. Let that power and energy flow into you

Take a glass of water with you. Talk and pray to it, to the spirit of the water as well as to Grandfather Sun. If you are sick, hurt, or having bad luck, or if you have been damaged in any way, ask the Grandfather Sun to shine his strong healing power, beauty and light into that water. After you have prayed for your family and yourself, drink that water. It will doctor you, heal you, and strengthen you.

I visualize the bright, warm power of Grandfather Sun slowly cleansing and recharging each of my psychic centers that are connected to the major glands of my endocrine system. I visualize a waterfall doing the cleansing. Repeat this affirmation: “I will be strong, I will be healthy, I will be happy, I will be protected, I will have a long life.” Then I hum, “I will be one with the Sun” four times. When I do this I can actually feel my vibratory level rising and all tension, anger, and frustration leaving my mind, body and soul. Sometimes I see an eagle come soaring in and try to merge my consciousness with his and fly through the sky, so relaxed, peaceful and happy.

-From Native Healer: Initiation into an Ancient Art by Medicine Grizzlybear Lake, with minor adaptations by me, angelicmoonfairy.